Wednesday, August 4, 2010

I Totally...

Tonight, I totally stepped out of my element.

I totally stepped into the unknown.

I totally let people into my personal crap.

I totally tried to be open.

I totally shared my heart.

I totally flipped out inside.

I totally feel emotionally fried.

I totally doubt myself.

I totally try to trust that God moved.

I totally wonder if I said everything wrong.

I totally wonder if I sounded self absorbed.

I totally pray that everything came out the way I wanted it to.

I totally need to release all my thoughts!!!

Good night.

1 comment:

Laura said...

I mean this with lots of love, Amber...Stop it. :) You did great. Know why? Because you did what God asked you to do. And you said it all beautifully. But it doesn't even matter what we thought (even though I know we were all impacted). The point is that you were obedient. Just remember what you talked about tonight. Trust God. He gave you the words, and you spoke them. REST in that. Intentionally.

And we all second-guess. Tonight I left feeling bad about taking up so much of the prayer time with my situation and then we all had to go. Almost every single time I've ever said anything in front of the church I've beat myself up afterward. Even when I've been certain of what God gave me to share. And in those times you just have to ask God "Was I obedient?" We all mess up, and have to work through it. But if we're obedient (like you were tonight), then those critical voices are NOT Him.

Rest in what He asked of you, my friend. I'm proud of you.