Saturday, August 30, 2008

A Gift

At the beginning of this year we were very briefly pregnant. We knew about our precious baby for less than one week before God called him home. So much has come out of this. Some good, and some not so good stuff has been in my life because of this tragedy. This is not what I want to tell you about right now, someday, just not now. This was necessary to tell you though, in light of what is really coming in this post.

I have a beautiful daughter, Lilly. I was never supposed to be able to get pregnant. We refused to fully give ourselves over to this brilliant diagnoses, It took three years into our marriage, but we finally got the two lines on the test. We had waited so long and gone through so much to see those two lines. I have never forgotten what a gift my Lily is. It is a wonderful act of God that she is even here.
Of course there are times that she drives me nuts. Times I don't want to be around her. That has never changed the fact that she is a gift to me from my all powerful God.
Losing my baby this year has again helped make that clear(not that I had ever forgotten). Thinking that I would have two wonderful, mischievous children to care for was an exciting blessing to think about. All that was gone so quickly, and then I was back to only having one baby to care for. This makes a mama realize very quickly that every child is a precious gift. That at any time your life could change, and that which means the most to you can be taken away. Savoring the time you have is important. Sometimes with children, especially young ones, we don't always remember that the time we spend with them is the most important time in life. God has given us our children as gifts, and sometimes we take that for granted. Sometimes we don't always realize what a gift that is.
My daughter, may not always be here. She has already had a lot thrown her way (more on that later). She could also be called home at any time.
Right now she is with me. God has given this gift to me to take care of. To lead to Him. To hold.
It's so easy to get wrapped up in the day, and work, and life, and mostly ourselves. We must remember that our children are gifts. That these gifts are not only a part of us, but a part of God.
Let's be careful to remember what a gift he has given us. Treat your gift with care. God gives you something very precious when he gives you a child, weather it's once or ten times. Each child is a gift. Losing one helps you see that. For those of you who have never lost a child, I pray He helps you see that with out the pain.
Because realizing that your child is a gift from God to you, one of the most beautiful gifts He gives, will change your life. It will change the way you see your child, your life, and the world. Seeing your child as a gift will change you, it's a good change.
Each child is a gift.

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